Calling, Ego or Just...SEO?

I stumbled across 5 Ways to Distinguish Calling from Ego in Inc. Magazine and felt the piece had tremendous relevance to my blogging here. Perhaps it will help other bloggers who stumble through this space. Most of all, maybe it can help others can be more at peace with themselves, allow them to trust what they write and how they create. The world is relentlessly cruel and most of all...in the cruelty from our selves upon our selves.  

This blog seems at first to be a symptom of the ego/calling struggle. I approach this blog more as art, expression and something I am either "in the mood" to do or "not in the mood to do." Can you tell? I think 2013 has been the leanest ever--like a drought of my soul. But I do wish to move others and to influence, I just can't seem to go about it in a way where I feel settled once it's done.

The Blessing and Curse of Effort

There's a fascinating game going on underneath. I think all bloggers fall prey to it--especially the ones like me who can relate to spending years avoiding one of the cardinal rules of blogging:  focused content. This poor little vehicle is just a catch-all place. The 7th realm of Hell we all know as "a personal blog." I try to tune into it for holidays or points during the year when I find I have something to note. But more than ever, it's just a chronicle of time here on earth...passing.

Is Your Journey Your Destination?
The awesome image at the top came right up when I searched for images on the word "egotistical." It reminds me of the Ten of Wands and the idea that work is a curse and a blessing. It makes us feel needed. But does it fulfill us? Is its journey enjoyable or is it all about the destination, the end point, the rush to Friday afternoon?

For fun, I summarized my answers to Dr. Shelley Prevost's diagnosis choices below. Don't be shy about commenting on where you land with each- it's kind of a fun quiz to take:

•  I fear not expressing myself. At this point, time has nothing to do with it.
• I need silence to survive. Hell, I'm up way past my bedtime now. Usually, I prefer to sleep. How now Sir Blog? Hast thee taken up in cahoots with the Brain today?
• I find doing this somewhat fulfilling. But I also love discovering what gets my SEO hot. I guess I'm a marketer at heart who likes the numbers games and am fascinated by some of the search queries that bring folks here. My top performing posts are a wild-ass nutzo hodgepodge of random shit! That would be the "personal" in "personal blog."
• Yeah, I'm all about the process. See my "in the mood, or not" reference above.
• Yes, I do want to impact others. At least with this post I do. That isn't always true, however. Otherwise, I classify it as Gen X syndrome:  I'm just kind of "meh."

I think what I love most about the lead image (thank you Wikipedia) is the wording translation from the French that goes with it:
"The cleverest burn their fingers at it, And those who grasp my lose it all." It reminds me of the wisdom that if you want anything too desperately, you can sometimes deter the very thing you want with the sheer force of your desperation.

Blog well, say nothing and act casual about your SEO and write in your own way dear Writers.

Image credits:  Wikipedia The Egotistical and the Envious Villian and Ten of Wands